As many of you know, the Game Awards 2023, hosted by Geoff Keighley, has just ended, with nary a mention of JAY LENO ADVENTURES. This took us all by surprise- I was told we were a shoe-in for best debut indie game, and I even thought we had a fair shot at game of the year. However, the injustices don't end here. In order to attend the show, I rented a suit and paid for a flight to Los Angeles, but I wasn't even allowed to enter the theater. Clearly, there was some kind of mistake, and I expect an apology from Mr. Keighley soon. I watched the ceremony from my phone in the parking lot. I'm not ashamed to say I wept.

Despite being snubbed, we here at Swag University hold our heads high, knowing that even if we didn't get the award, we are the rightful game of the year. What follows is an unabridged copy of my acceptance speech which I unfortunately didn't get to use tonight.

I guess we were all expecting this, right?

Hold for applause

No, but really, thank you all, from the bottom of my heart. I never doubted for a second that we'd win, and it's all thanks to our talented developers, and devoted fans, and of course, Jay Leno Himself.

Hold for applause- 20 seconds

To everyone who ever doubted us- eat shit, eat shit, eat shit. We are on top of the world and you are DIRT. The dirt I walk on. Suck it. (Make a "suck it" hand motion)

Hold for applause- 30 seconds

Good night everybody!

That's all. Too bad it didn't work out, but life's too short to be bitter. There's always next year.

With love,

Swag University